Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I wish I could punch you in the face.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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