On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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