just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
