Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize