i'm signing you up for texting rehab
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
