so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
