So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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