Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour