Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
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