I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Randomize
