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• (713): View more from Texas

  Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.

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• (250): View more from British Columbia

  Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (361): View more from Texas

  I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.

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• (971): View more from Oregon

  I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed

  (425): View more from Washington

  Yeah, that sounds like my life.

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• (251): View more from Alabama

  THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.

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• (563): View more from Iowa

  I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (731): View more from Tennessee

  you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?

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• (347): View more from New York

  Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?

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• (058): View more from

  Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary

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