I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
