I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
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