All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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