This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
