how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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