If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
