You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
