its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
