How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
And then my night got REAL pukey
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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