I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
