Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
