Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
