someone get that fucking seahorse.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
