id be glad to
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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