Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
