i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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