She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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