respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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