i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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