real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
