Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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