i permit you to call me
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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