Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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