THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
