I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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