I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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