Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
How does it feel to date your dad?
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