I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
