oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Randomize
