yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
