I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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