If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MIDGETS
????
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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