he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
