Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
we should paint friendship bongs
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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