is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Sext me about skeletons
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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