...so i touched it.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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