Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
