Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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