I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.